Facebook Relationship Statuses; What they really mean

The following is my take on what Facebook Relationship Statuses really say
Its normally not what you think

Single:
A) I really am single
B) I refuse to change my status even tho im in a relationship, because im not sure where its going and i dont want to eliminate any potential options
C) im a horny individual and my single status allows me to hit on anyone

In a Relationship (no person specified)
A) I actually in a relationship but do not want to say with whom
B) I have been tricked into the relationship, the individual is ugly, help me Obi Wan Kenobi, you are my only hope
C) Im not in a relationship, I just put this up so the creepy person stalking me might leave me alone
D) Im not in a relationship, I just put this up to piss off my ex
E) Im not in a relationship, I just put this up to attract attention cause everyone always wants what they cant have
F) Im not in a relationship, this just makes creeping and stalking more easy

In a Relationship with (your actual lover)
A) I am in a relationship with this person and I am very happy to be with them
B) I am solely putting the individual's name here so my ex can creep out this person and see how much better the new person is
C) Please look at how awesome my new person is!
D) I really think you should look at the person in my status
E) She made me put this (never other way around)

In a Relationship with (a friend's name that you really aren't in a relationship with)
A) I'm an Idiot! YAYYYY!

It's Complicated (no person specified)
A) I looove attention and I really want everyone to feel sorry for me
B) This is a ploy and I want everyone to put their guards down and trust me so i can suck their blood (with all the Twilight stuff nowadays, you see this a lot)
C) I got into a fight with my significant other and i need some attention from the opposite sex
D) My imaginary friend disappeared, i miss that friend

It's Complicated with (your actual lover or future ex)
A) I need to win this fight and facebook support is what i need!
B) Just so we are clear or maybe you are confused, but this confirms that the 2 of us have issues and you need to change. (clearly this person is right, right?)
C) It's a joke right before we announce our engagement or it's a terrible april fool's joke!
D) It's a ploy to get someone to come over and console me, but then i convince them to have sex with me and have my future ex walk in and get rid of them for good!
E) I'm an idiot, theres nothing wrong but i over re-acted
F) She made me put this (never other way around)

Engaged or Married (no person specified)
A) I have ruined my life and i dont want you to see the person in which i made a huge mistake
B) This is another ploy to get laid
C) My significant other is ugly, please dont creep their page

Engaged or Married with (your actual lover)
A) I have ruined my life with this person
B) She made me put this (never other way around)

Engaged or Married with (a friend's name that you really aren't in a relationship with)
A) I'm an Idiot! YAYYYY!

No status:
A) stop being such a nosey jerk
B) No reason other than that